Fanmail can be Tramatic For Small Children
by Kitti and Satoshi
Summary: extremely insane. please dont ask about the title. you really dont want to know. R&R! :)


Disclaimer- We own nothing but ourselves. How sad... :-(  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~*~  
  
Somewhere in the 4kids entertainment studio, Ash, Misty, Brock, Tracy, Gary, Team Rocket (both), Giovanni, Nurse Joy, Officer Jenny, Jezibell, Dr Fuji, Kurt, Professor Elm, Professor Ivy, and Professor Oak were all gathered in a room with white walls, a white tiled floor, and a purple ceiling.   
  
Ash- *random outburst* Oh yeah! I rule!  
Brock- What was that for?  
Ash- I dunno, just needed to reassure myself.  
Brock- Oh. OK!  
  
All of the sudden (dun dun dun) the door opened and another trainer that goes by the alias of Kitti got thrown in.   
  
Kitti- Hey! Why am I here?  
Satoshi- Because I am on vacation in the Orange Islands sitting on a beach with one of those little pineapple drinks with the parasol and really can't be bothered tending to these psychos. Especially when we have to read them fanmail...  
Everyone Else- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
  
Two 4kids scientists enter the room. They go by the name of Mr Bob and Mr Fred. Then they reveal themselves to be ditto. And Mewtwo himself enters the room.  
  
Mewtwo- Mwhahahahahahha! Actually this may not be fun. But if we don't start answering the dreaded fanmail then our paychecks will be severely decreased and the inbox may suffer possible overload and the end result won't be pretty.  
  
Pikachu and Togepi hand Mewtwo the first dreaded letter.  
  
Mewtwo- Lets see...this one is for Ash!  
  
Dear Ash,  
  
Guess what. I think you are a looser and really should f*** off and...  
  
Jezibell- It is not proper to swear in the middle of a sentence when there are small children under the age of 13 in the room.  
Giovanni- Oh shut up already.  
Jezibell- Who the h*** are you?  
Kitti- I thought you said not to swear?  
Jezibell- F*** off you little b***h!  
Satoshi- Noooooooooooo! The beeper broke!  
Giovanni- To answer your question, I am Giovanni, the almighty leader of Team Rocket. And I happen to have a gun in my pocket. If you don't be silent, I will shoot.  
Jezibell- It is not proper to carry around weapons of mass destruction and threaten to shoot innocent –  
  
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! BANG! EXPLOSIVE NOISES!   
  
Jezibell- He...got...me...*dramatic arm-to-forehead faint*  
Giovanni- Oh sh**. I brought my capgun. She'll have to die later.  
Jezibell- *revived* WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT CURSING?  
Mewtwo- Ahem.  
  
And that you're just a looser that joins the club with Misty wayyyyyyyy to often and you didn't deserve to be the orange league champ. And you're not worthy of being the rival of Gary Oak.  
  
Your Pal,  
  
Satoshi  
  
Misty- DID YOU HEAR THAT ASH?! GO AND AVENGE YOUR HONOR!!!  
Ash- *dreamily* I have all the Johto league badges. I'm the champion. I am Johto itself at its most prosperous point...  
Kitti- *raises eyebrow skeptically* Wha...  
Joy- He uses big words in his sleep.  
Everyone else- OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! WOW!  
Pikachu- Pika! Pika chu! Pikachu pika pika! Chu!  
Mewtwo- Grrrrrrrrr... *casts random attack*  
Pikachu- James...wha...............  
Mewtwo- I'm granting you to speak in our language so we won't have to listen to you saying your names over and over again. *like a fairy god mother* I'm your fairy god-mewtwo. It'll only last till midnight!   
Jenny- ...right.... -_-;  
Pikachu- James, you have received a brown paper bag in the mail. It appears to be filled with homemade cookies!  
James- Yay!   
Pikachu- I'm not finished!  
James- *shuts up*  
Pikachu- Unfortunately, you cannot have them.  
James- Why?! *throws a tantrum*  
Pikachu- By the way, I ate them.  
James- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
Mewtwo- Can we just get on with it d*****?!  
Satoshi- Yay! I fixed the beeper!  
Mewtwo- Lets go on to the next blasted letter and get this over with!!!  
  
Pikachu hands him the next letter.  
  
Mewtwo- This one is for ... Kitti.  
Kitti- Yay! I have a fan! :) go me.  
  
Dear Kitti,  
  
Jesse- *kicks James*  
James- What was that for?  
Jesse- I dunno. I just felt like reeking havoc over something and you were the closest.  
James- *cheerful* Oh. OK!  
Mewtwo- WILL you please hurry up! *pulls out calender* Lets see...I'm having lunch with Giovanni at two, taking over the world at four, and still have to be home for dinner at seven!  
Dr Fuji- That's right! And you better not be late!  
Tracy- Who are you?  
Dr Fuji- I have to be here! I'm important!  
Brock- I've never heard of you...  
Dr Fuji- I created Mewtwo! If it wasn't for me, we wouldn't all be sitting here!  
Everyone Else- *death glares*  
Dr Fuji- Uh, that was the wrong thing to say. *gets beaten up*  
  
Machoke come out and drag Dr Fuji off.  
  
Machoke- Maaaa...choke!  
Mewtwo- I am reading the letter now...  
  
Dear Kitti,  
  
You are the awesome-ist trainer out of all awesome trainers! You are the sweet-ist of the sweet!  
  
Satoshi- Someone's kissin up... *glares at Gary*  
Gary- Heheheh...* blush, staring at Kitti, who is amusing herself taking careful aim at Mewtwo's head with a straw*  
Kitti- *blows spitball*  
Mewtwo- Hey! Who did that?!  
Kitti- *whistles innocently*  
Mewtwo- Moving on...  
Gary- My hottie...I mean hero! *blush*  
Everyone else- -_-; Riiiiiiight...   
  
Ok, I have about ten more pages worth of stuff and a bad case of writers cramp from all the other letters...  
  
Cassidy- What do you mean...other letters...  
Mewtwo- There's about twenty more letters in here, but some are a little...descriptive and we want this story a PG. So I can't read them to you.  
Everyone Else- Oh man... *everyone except Gary, Kitti, and Satoshi run after Mewtwo trying to rip away the letters*  
Mewtwo- *uses shadow ball attack on Ash*  
Ash- *special defense fell*  
Gary- O.o  
Mewtwo- Moving on...  
  
...call me later! Actually, new plan! Meet me outside the 4kids studio later! :)  
  
Mewtwo- Theres...no signature?  
Gary/Brock/James/Butch/Tracy- It's from me!  
Mewtwo- ... It could be anyone. Oh well! Next letter! It's for Botch!   
Butch- The name is BUTCH!  
  
Dear Botch,  
  
Butch- What did I just say?!  
  
Mewtwo- Wait, its from...Cassidy? And its an invitation. To a party. At her house...in her...uh...erm...  
Kitti- That bad?  
Mewtwo- Worse.  
Butch- Where? I have to know where to go!  
Mewtwo...OK....in her bedroom.  
Everyone (but Ash, Misty, Butch, and Cassidy)- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!  
Butch/Cassidy/Ash/Misty- Lets go! We can do a foursome!  
Dr Fuji- *knocking on window* Can I come?  
Cassidy- Sure! Pleanty to go around!  
Gary- Is that even possible?  
Kitti- I really don't wanna stick around to find out.  
Tracy- Hey! I wanna go!  
Brock/Jesse/James- Us too!  
Cassidy- Yay! Come on!  
Satoshi- A ninesome? Wow...  
Kitti- I thought you were in the Orange Islands.  
Satoshi- Oh yeah! *runs to Orange Islands and sits in a lounge chair*  
Mewtwo- So that leaves Professor Oak, Professor Elm, Professor Ivy, Giovanni, Gary, Kitti, and myself.  
Giovanni- Ya know what Kitti? That letter earlier...it was from me!  
Kitti- Aren't you just a little bit old for me?  
Giovanni- Nooooooooooo! The horrid truth. *leaves to go to the party all dejected*  
Professor Ivy- ...tensome? I think I'll go make it an elevensome!  
Professor Elm- Twelvesome!  
Professor Oak- I think I'll make it a thirteensome!  
Cassidy- *pops in, half clothed*   
Gary/Kitti- Ahhhhh! *Cover eyes*  
Cassidy- You're a bit too old Oakie.  
Oak- Oh man.... *goes to market, buys a quart of ice cream, sits in front of TV and starts to eat all dejectedly*  
Kitti- Why don't you just make like a tree and leave?  
Cassidy- So funny. Where didja learn that one? Professor *Oak*?  
Gary- *laughing* hahahahahahahah... *notices Oak* Oh sorry Gramps.  
Oak- *eats big spoon of icecream* *with mouth ful* Even my own grandson...AHHHHHHHHHH! BRAINFREEZE!!!  
Cassidy- I'll be leaving now...if you guys wanna join us and make it a fourteensome then you know where to find us.  
Oak- I can make it a thirteensome! Then we drag them to it and make it a fifteensome!  
Cassidy- Oh fine. Come on.  
  
All of the sudden, Mewtwo, Pikachu, and Togepi grab Gary and Kitti and run off to the party.  
  
Gary/Kitti- Ahhhhhhhhhhh! HEEEEEEEEEEELP USSSSSSSSS!  
Satoshi- *calls*   
Answering Macine- Hi! You have reached the 4kids studio. If you want to leave a message, press one. If you want James's femine side to be revealed, press two. If you are a member of Team Rocket and have taken over the world, press three.  
Satoshi- *presses three by accident*  
Answering Macine- Thank you. As soon as the Jenny Factory is back up and running, we shall send cops to your door to arrest you. Meanwhile, would you like to see James's feminine side? Press one now.  
Satoshi- *presses one*  
  
James appears on the video phone screen in a bikini.  
  
Satoshi- Wow...didn't need to see that. *hands up phone*  
  
Some random 4kids people appear in the room with a large sack.  
  
Dr Bob- They're not here. They've escaped!  
Dr Fred- I guess we can leave this new fanmail here.   
Dr Bob- Hey! Whats this?  
Dr Fred- Lets go!  
  
Dr Fred and Dr Bob somehow grab Satoshi and drag him to the party, where Kitti and Gary were cowering in fear under the bed, waiting to be rescued.   
  
Gary- Ow! That was my head!  
Cassidy- What was that... *lifts up dust ruffle* There you guys are! *drags them to the life of the party*  
Kitti- Gary!  
Gary- Oppsie...  
  
The door opens and Satoshi gets thrown into the life of the party.  
  
Dr Fred- Lets join them!  
Dr Bob- OK!  
Cassidy- Yay! It's a twentytwosome! *does quick calculations* I think that makes it...one girl to every two guys?  
Kitti- I'm not hangin around to find out! *runs away and slams door*  
Gary/Satoshi- Wait for us!!! *leave*  
Nurse Joy- A ninteensome isn't bad.  
Kurt- What about me? I haven't said one thing in this entire fic!  
Kitti- *opens door* Haha you just did.  
Kurt- Oh yeah! *Enters the life of the party.*  
Cassidy- A twentysome! Lets send it to the world records people!  
Everyone Else at Party- Not now. We're having fun. Lets do it later.  
Cassidy- Good point. *jumps back to the life of the party*  
  
  
  
  
  
~*~The End~*~  
  
Kitti- Oh yeah...I was supposed to meet Gary wasn't I? *leaves*  
Satoshi- Riiiiiight...Review people! Bye. 


End file.
